I Wanna Scary Mommy!

The Blogoshere so full of fun an amazing people and Scary Mommy is one of those people.

Ok, now that the blatant patootie kiss is out of the way, here’s the deal;

YES I love Scary Mommy to bits, but I am also really feelin her contest. Scary Mommy is in search of another Scary Mommy. In honor of the new movie Motherhood, a unique movie about a real mom, she’s looking for some other Scary Mommies out there.

And even though I feel REALLY awkward about this, I’d like to throw my hat in the ring. I like my blog. I like lettin ‘er all hang out when it comes to parenthood. Because, at the end of the day it doesn’t matter that our house looks like wolves live there or supper came out of a microwave, it matters that we did our best and loved our babies.

This post is not all that old, but it is my favorite. Fellow Scary Mommies, here is
The Mommy Contract:
A week or so ago I a post called The Smudge. In that post I wrote of The Mommy Contract. Allow me to elaborate. The Mommy Contract is basically the unwritten rules/details of parenthood that no one tells you when you’re up to your eyeballs in pregnancy bliss, pickles and ice cream (in my case it was Chicken & Stars soup and Hardees Big Roast Beefs-seriously), and all things fluffybabycute. BUT, the truth of the matter is, as soon as you grow your little seed of love, the universe aligns (or mis-aligns) and all of the below points become of a fact of life. Once you enter the realm of The Mommy Contract, these are the things that become reality:

1: You will struggle, be confused, and screw up alot.
2: You will freak out at every boo-boo and runny nose. (note to self: buy Bandaids in bulk).
3: You will cry just as hard as them when they get shots at the Dr.
4: You will want to beat the hell out of bad drivers who cut us off in traffic. They are endangering our babies….jerks!
5: You will become as protective as a Mama Grizzly Bear when strangers are around (or when the little light-of-our-lives finally venture out into the world alone).
6: You will never get a decent nights sleep until your children are at least 30.
7: You will wear spit-up on your clothes like a badge of honor (hence,
The Smudge)
8: You will obsess for weeks on simple things like Halloween costumes, because we want our darlings to have perfect holiday. Only to have them refuse to wear the costume. Period.
9: You will allow your heart to silently weep when you watch the news and hear of children being hurt or abused. We KNOW what gifts from God our children are.
10: You will eventually admit it’s OK to be completely annoyed by your own offspring…but only to other Mommies who “get it”.
11: You will avoid the arcade at Wal-mart for your own sanity.
12: You will try to remember to never give a toddler a sucker in the car unless you have LOTS of wipes handy or plan to head right home.
13: You will occasionally forget that you should never put the kids to bed with stuffed critters that talk. Unless you don’t mind hearing “ELMO LOVES YOU!” in the middle of the night.
14: You will have the urge roll your eyes and snicker at someonelse’s kid having a melt-down in a store. Don’t do it. Someday, that will be you.
15: You will realize quickly that when it comes to kids, allow lots of time, have lots of patience, and give lots of love.
16. You will make “picking your battles” part of your daily routine. If your toddler wants to wear swim goggles to daycare, and isn’t budging on the matter….roll with it Mommy.
17: You will recognize the sweetness of hearing your tot say “Mommy!” even if it is usually followed by “I’m stinky!”
18: You will find out that sometimes Daddy’s do know what they are doing.
19: You will admit that’s it’s OK to want a better life for your kids than what you had.
20: You will TRY to remember with every child you have, you lose a huge chunk of brain cells. End of story.( I’d continue, but I forgot what I was going to say).

p.s ……AND IT’S ALL TOTALLY WORTH IT. :)

Never Miss a Poop Story. Subscribe HERE http://feeds.feedburner.com/blogspot/dpfZp

Comments

  1. says

    Hi! Congrats on being the FB at This Mama Rocks. I’m not a mom, but a lot of the things in this mommy contract can apply to teachers, which I am, especially #20.

  2. says

    Oh, that is only too too true. way too true. As my sweet son lays against me and I feel the love flowing from me at this moment, I was so irritated an hour ago, when daddy got home I pushed him towards the stairs and told that hubby of mine ” I…….AM……..DONE!!!!!!”

  3. says

    I absolutely loved your blog! I’m a mom to 4 kids and boy have I ever gone through every one of these things PLUS lol

    They are all older now, but the list just keeps getting longer the older they get…you ended at number 20, i’m on about number 50. LOL And as I look back, every minute was so worth it. :)

    I’m following you and grabbing your button.
    http://www.homespunheartscandles.blogspot.com

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *